The holidays and the Winter Break can be challenging for many children with autism. Managing the long break from school routines, crowded family functions, and high social expectations is not easy for them. If the child is unhappy, so are the parents. Events might not go exactly as planned.
The best present during this season is the Gift of Grace. We have to extend grace to our kids and not expect perfection. They might need to retreat from the parties into a separate room with fewer sensory demands. They might not eat the same dinner as everyone else. They might not appreciate Aunt Carol’s gift.
And that’s okay.
We also have to lower our own expectations for perfection. We might be able to get all the children dressed in matching outfits for a photograph. We might not have had time to make the special cookies that everyone loves.
And that’s okay, too.
At the same time, the holidays and the winter break can be an opportunity for us to see our kids’ challenges in a new light. Perhaps they need more behavioral help. Perhaps they could do a little more work on overcoming their sensory issues.
We can accept our kids for who they are. We can unburden ourselves from outside pressures for perfection. And at the same time, we can regroup our efforts to help them be their best selves. So, maybe in January, after they go back to school, we might increase after-school therapy, schedule another doctor’s appointment, and tweak their goals.
Parents with autism must combine acceptance, appreciation, and advocacy. We love our kids for who they are, while helping them achieve their potential. The staff at the Cope Center for Autism can help parents find that right balance.